Is being stay at home mom easy? Let’s talk about it in this post & try to break some myths around being a SAHM.
Being a parent is a huge responsibility in itself. It does come with a lot of benefits too like the fun, laughter and all the love from your tiny beings. But the primary role of being responsible for your child’s life is at the very core of parenthood.
Then whether it is a SAHM or a Working Mom, it does not change the equation drastically. In this post, I would talk about whether it is easy to a SAHM or not?
Is Being Stay at Home Mom Easy?
Let me begin this discussion by giving you some food for thought, some points to ponder over, and then we will take this discussion forward.
Do you agree? Motherhood is the toughest job in the whole world.
The famous singer declaring her take on motherhood is the hardest job and that children come into our lives to give us our learnings.
And then this, The American Actress summing it all up. It does not matter whether you are a SAHM or a working mom, you are in a marriage or single, motherhood is the toughest job in the whole world.
With this background let us now talk about things that make the SAHM life what is it.
Being a SAHM Means You Are Always Available to Your Kids
Being a SAHM is not just about feeding the kids and overlooking them for safety. It is about feeding the kids every 30 mins, managing their tantrums every 5 minutes, solving the sibling conflicts every 15 mins, keeping them engaged with newer activities and regimes almost every second of the day.
It also means doing all the house chores end to end and in all of this madness fitting your own self, your food, your grooming time, and your own Me time. Well, it is not easy being a SAHM while you are always there for your kids. You are their first point of contact to every need, want, desire & mind tactics too at times.
So being a SAHM means you are always available to your kids and trust me that is not an easy task at all. It keeps you running on your toes especially if you are blessed with more than 2 kids.
Being a SAHM Means You Are Doing Most of the Chores
Managing a big house and trying to keep it clean with young kids at home is a huge challenge in itself. While you are not setting out to work to add on to the family income, and you are at home, you are expected to manage a majority if not all of the household chores. And trust me that managing a household is a full-time job and is not a walk in the ark at all.
Being a SAHM Means You Are the Last on Your Priority List
This comes so naturally to stay at home moms, that we just give our own priorities, our own thoughts a back seat while enabling everyone else to accomplish their things.
A typical day in my home would start at 6 am when I wake my kids to get ready for school. Now helping them with brushing and dressing up, cooking & packing their snack boxes, filling their water bottles, arranging their bags and making them eat their quick snack in the morning, it’s time to drop them to school.
After kids are off to school, it is time to prepare for his lunch and breakfast. And in the middle of all this chaos, for years I had missed my morning tea just in this morning rush. And this definitely made me cranky and half-dead by 10 am when my husband left for his office.
Being a SAHM, You Are Dealing With the Said & Unsaid Stigmas of SAHM Life
While managing all the demands of a SAHM job, you are dealing also dealing with people’s perspectives and beliefs related to the life of a stay at home mom. You want it or not, but you are into it all the time. Your stay at home mom title decides what place you would have in society and how other people would treat you. And this is not an easy thing to live with at all.
No Parenting Challenges Are Expected to Arise When You Are a SAHM
This is an awesome one. While you are a stay at home mom, you are supposed to be in complete control of your kids. Because you are available with them 24 by 7 and watching over them, you are expected to know even the slightest deviation from normal. You are expected to be your child’s best friend, confidante, and the one whom he comes to when he is in trouble.
While this is an ideal situation for any mom to be in, but haven’t we all lived through those times when our kids just want their space, when they want to share things with their friends and when they are trying to resolve conflicts or issues on their own?
But Nah! This is neither expected when you are a SAHM and simply not acceptable too when kids have a mom who has parenting as her main focus area.
Being a SAHM, You Are the First One to Sacrifice on Big and Small Things
Of course, this is true. For once you are at home enjoying your best life with nothing much to exhaust you, you can really give up on small things of life. You being a SAHM can do this much. And for bigger things, well, fight out the bigger issues like Self worth & Guilt inside your head or just simply give up.
SAHMs are just not worth the best things in life. And it is not just the society around that is telling you that, many times we women are so harsh on ourselves to believe in this crap too.
Being a SAHM, You Crave for Appreciation
This is a big one. Being a SAHM, you are doing everything to keep everything in order and it takes a lot from you both physically as well as mentally, however when it comes to acknowledgments & appreciation, being a SAHM is a total loss.
Especially when you compare the situation to when you had a well-paying job. You were a star performer and were very well appreciated for all that you contributed to.
So, it’s definitely not easy to keep continuing with all your efforts when you feel under-appreciated for your hard work.
Being a SAHM, You Deal With Exhaustion, Monotony & No Break Life
Being a SAHM, one has to do the household chores and there is no denying from that. At times it becomes monotonous and boring to do the same things every day. But getting a break from these household chores and responsibilities is something that does not come easy to a SAHM.
Being a SAHM, Everyone Feels Competent to Pass Judgments on Your Motherhood
Another thing that really makes the life of a SAHM difficult is that everyone is and I mean everyone is competent enough to pass judgments about how you are parenting. They have their views about everything that you do and no they won’t shy away from talking behind your back too.
So my conclusive answer to Is being a SAHM easy is a Big No. It is not easy to live the life of a SAHM.
But if you ask me is living. SAHM life fulfilling, my answer is a Big Big Yes. It is extremely enriching to be a SAHM because you can be with your kids whenever they need you. You are there to witness their important milestones and most so because you are able to cherish the real motherhood at its own sweet pace.
What Can You do to Ease your SAHM life?
Now that we know about all the difficulties that a SAHM faces in her life can we do somethings to better manage these difficulties? Of course yes. Here are my top tips on how to ease your life as a SAHM.
|1. Follow a Routine
Invest time in creating a Morning Routine for yourself. Take out time for all the important tasks and activities you need to do. But also keep aside time for yourself. Do some meditation at the start of the day if you enjoy that or simply step out for a walk amongst trees.
|2. Invest In Some ‘Me’ Time
Spend time in things that are important to you and that you enjoy doing. Prioritise yourself along with all others that you do.
|3. Exercise Daily
Spending an hour every day on your fitness is the least you can do for yourself. And always remember, only a healthy mom can take care of her family well. So invest in your wellness.
|4. Follow your passion
Do something that you enjoy doing and that gives you happiness. From gardening to playing strings, from painting to just reading a book, take out some time every day for your hobbies.
|5. Have House Rules in Place
While love and pampering are important for kids, having firm house rules that are the same for anybody and everybody is something that really helps set the expectations and consequences straight.
|6. Spend time with your friends
There is nothing more therapeutic to us ladies than even a mindless chit chat with our friends. So spend time with people who love you and who let you loose your hair down.
|7. Take regular breaks & tune out of Motherhood
Do take regular breaks to rejuvenate yourself and indulge in whatever helps you reduce your everyday stress. Indulge in a beauty treatment or a spa, go for some movie or simply to a cafe alone for a cup of warm coffee and a piece of cake that you don’t have to share.
|8. Dress up Well
This one is really important. Dress up well every day even if you don’t have to step out. It not only makes you feel good but also keeps you on top of a lot of things. You feel more put together and more in control of your house and your life too.
|9. Divide the house chores
Even if you are staying at home, you definitely need a helping hand. Fairly divide house chores with your partner. Infact involve kids to do their parts too.
|10. Work on your Self Worth
Strengthen your belief in your own self everyday. you are staying at home because it is good for your kids. And you are doing the most important job of the world. Sadly it does not come with a salary but you deserve all the best things of this life
This is all I had to say as far as this question is concerned. Please share your thoughts with me on how you feel as a SAHM and do you think life is easy as a SAHM?
In the meanwhile, you can browse through some other useful and resourceful posts I have on SAHM life. And if you are looking for food inspiration, click here for some simple yet delicious meal ideas for your family.